Did you ever hear a song that made you feel like you belonged, even when you weren’t quite sure where you fit in? That’s how I felt the first time I heard Sly & the Family Stone. I was standing in my kitchen—halfway between breakfast and a full-on existential crisis about my future family—when my playlist dished up 'Everyday People.' The groove hooked me, but it’s the message that truly shook something loose.
Just this week, I watched ABC News’s moving tribute to Sly Stone, and it got me thinking: What do we really inherit from our heroes—our chosen family, and our literal family, too? Sly wasn’t just the unapologetic front man of funk; he was an architect of community, radiating a message that everyone could find a place at the table…and the dance floor.
But what if your table’s missing something? That’s the question I kept circling as my partner and I tried (and tried… and tried) to get pregnant. For a while, it felt less 'Family Affair' and more 'Dance to the Music'—everyone else seemed to be grooving in step while we fumbled with our own complicated fertility choreography.
The Funky Family Blueprint
Let’s be real: We all imagine growing our families will be a little more 'sing-along' and a lot less 'experimental jazz,' right? There’s this cultural script we pick up—meet, marry, magic baby, cue happy ending. But watching Sly’s story reminded me how much beauty there is in flipping the script. He didn’t just blend genres; he built a whole new groove.
My partner and I needed a new track—one that fit our beat. Like so many here at Nestful, we started researching options outside the typical clinical setting. That’s when we found at-home insemination and realized that families, like funk bands, thrive when you mix in some improvisation.
Breaking the Mold (and the Stigma)
If you’ve ever felt like you’re not doing things the 'right' way, Sly gets it. He led musicians who looked, loved, and lived differently from what audiences expected. And let’s be honest: the fertility world still has its biases. We felt it—from awkward pharmacy conversations to side-eyes when we explained our decision to try insemination at home.
But here’s the thing: Building a family doesn’t come in just one genre. We leaned into resources—guides, personal stories, and (shameless plug: check out this incredibly supportive resource for at-home insemination that answered questions I didn’t even know I had). The kits were discreet, cost-effective, and honestly, made us feel like we were in control again. Knowing we weren’t alone on this new path made all the difference, especially reading that MakeAMom’s average success rate is 67%. That kind of hope is its own kind of music.
Lessons from a Legend
There’s a line in the ABC News segment that stuck with me: Sly Stone’s songs 'became America’s soundtrack.' They did that because he was brave enough to invite everyone in—to blur the lines, to say, 'You matter.'
Isn’t that the essence of family-building? Whether you’re starting with a donated sample, an at-home kit, or an adoption application, what matters is the love, intention, and community you build along the way. There’s no playlist for this journey, no choreography you have to follow. You get to set your own tempo.
Here’s what I learned, in true Sly fashion:
- There’s no single way to make a family (or a band).
- It’s okay if your journey looks nothing like the radio edit—sometimes the remix is better.
- When you find the tools or support that fit your groove (whether that’s an at-home insemination kit or a message board full of fellow travelers), lean in. Celebrate it.
Your Turn: Make a Little Noise
Maybe you’re just starting your journey or maybe you’ve been dancing to this beat for years—either way, you’re not alone. I’m grateful for spaces like Nestful and innovations from companies like MakeAMom that help us rewrite the family soundtrack for a new generation.
So, what song gets you through the hard days? And have you found an unconventional way to make your family dream a reality? Drop your story below—let’s keep the groove going.
After all, in the wise funk of Sly, 'Everybody is a star.' And every family has its own unforgettable tune.