“I finally feel I belong in the room.” That’s what Sharon Horgan said about her hard-won confidence after the second season of Bad Sisters (source). Now, maybe you’re thinking, ‘I’m not a TV star, and my “room” is more doctor’s office than red carpet.’ But her words hit home for anyone navigating the wild, weird, and emotional path to parenthood.
Here’s a little secret I wish someone had whispered to me at the start: You don’t HAVE to feel ‘ready’ to take your next step. In fact, most of us never do.
The Myth of Total Confidence—And Why It Holds Us Back
Let’s be honest. Whether you’re single, partnered, LGBTQ+, or somewhere in-between, the journey to start a family is intimidating. There are so many moments when you feel like you’re waiting for a sign, waiting for certainty, waiting just to FEEL READY. Here’s what no one tells you:
- Confidence rarely comes at the start.
- Sometimes, it’s only after you make a move that you finally feel like you belong.
- The “perfect time” is usually a myth.
Sharon Horgan didn’t suddenly wake up confident in her talent. For most of us, especially those considering alternative paths to parenthood—like at-home insemination, IVF, or donor conception—confidence is something we build along the way.
But what’s the real cost of waiting to feel ready?
My ‘Not Ready’ Moment (Or, How I Almost Missed My Chance)
I’ll be honest: I spent months lurking on support forums, devouring testimonials, and eyeing fertility kits like they were ancient relics—fascinating, but terrifying. My partner and I would have those half-whispered, late-night talks: “Should we try now? What if it doesn’t work? What if we’re not doing it right?”
Sound familiar? The truth is, if we’d waited to feel 100% confident, we’d still be waiting. It wasn’t until we took a hesitant leap—ordering a kit after weeks of indecision—that we found any real sense of empowerment. Not total confidence, but movement. And that was enough.
Why Starting is Sometimes the Hardest Part
The journey to parenthood isn’t a straight line. It’s more like a paint-splattered, twisty rollercoaster, and sometimes the very first dip is the scariest. Here’s what often holds people back:
- Fear of failure. What if it doesn’t work? (Spoiler: That’s a possibility, but it’s not the end!)
- Information overload. So many kits, so many terms, so many opinions.
- Worry about ‘doing it wrong’. Seriously, whose instructions are we supposed to follow?
But here’s the thing: Everyone starts somewhere. And nobody—no blogger, no doctor, not even Sharon Horgan—walks in feeling like they’re the expert from day one.
Finding Tools (and Communities) That Actually Empower You
During our late-night research sessions, we kept stumbling across forums where real people shared real stories. It was a lifeline. These weren’t perfect narratives—they were messy, honest, and full of two steps forward, one step back. But every single story had one thing in common: At some point, someone decided to just… start.
That’s exactly why I’m a fan of resources that simplify, not complicate, these steps. There are now at-home insemination kits—like the ones offered by MakeAMom’s trusted site—that cut through the medical jargon and deliver everything you need, minus the embarrassment, confusion, or anxiety. Their kits are discreet (yes, literally no labels on the package!), reusable, and designed for specific circumstances, whether you’re dealing with low motility sperm or navigating sensitivities like vaginismus.
I didn’t know all this at first. But discovering solutions made for real people—not just ‘perfect’ or ‘fully confident’ ones—changed everything for us.
What If You Still Don’t Feel Ready?
Here’s the big reveal: Even after you start, you’ll have wobbles. There will be moments of doubt, and yes, maybe a few tears. But just by showing up—by making a call, ordering a kit, joining a community—you’re building the very confidence you didn’t think you had.
If Sharon Horgan can admit she “finally feels she belongs” only after big career wins, maybe belonging is something you give yourself permission for, over time. Not something you wait for. Not something you earn, but something you live into as you go.
So, What’s Your Next Step?
Are you hanging back, waiting to feel perfectly prepared before you try that kit, reach out to a group, or just say aloud, “We want this”? Maybe today’s the day to take a tiny, imperfect step. Browse real-life stories, check out informational sites like this one with tips for at-home insemination, or just share a comment below about what’s holding you back.
Confidence doesn’t show up before you begin. It’s grown, step by step, in the middle of your mess.
So, what’s the one small thing you can do today to get closer to your dream? I’d love to hear about it in the comments—and maybe, just maybe, you’ll help someone else feel a little bit less alone in their own “not ready yet” moment.
You belong in this room. Right now. Even if you don’t feel it—yet.