Raise your hand if you’ve ever wanted to reward yourself for ‘putting up’ with someone else’s pregnancy. Wait—don’t answer that out loud. Especially if your partner is in the room.
That’s exactly the hot mess that went viral when a new mom, fresh off a tough pregnancy, learned her partner wanted a vacation for surviving her so-called ‘moods’ (read the story here).
Let’s be real: It’s 2025, and apparently, empathy is still not available in bulk at Costco. So: Is it ever okay to make pregnancy all about you, the non-birthing partner? Spoiler: Nope. But—don’t bail on this article yet. Because whether you’re DIY-ing your parenthood journey at home, shopping for insemination kits, or supporting a pregnant partner—emotional labor is real, unavoidable, and not a competition.
Let’s look at what actual support looks like (with a few twists), and how you can avoid becoming the next headline in the ‘Are you kidding me?’ news cycle.
So, Why Are We Still Blaming ‘Pregnancy Moods’?
If you’ve ever said, “She’s just hormonal,” I have news: You’re not only wrong, but you’re missing out on the deeper magic of teamwork. Pregnancy is a wild ride of physical changes, emotional swerves, and (let’s not sugarcoat it) sometimes truly Olympic-level morning sickness. It’s biology, sure—but it’s also a test of partnership.
But here’s the question: What does good support really look like during pregnancy, fertility treatment, or home insemination?
5 Ways to Be a Gold-Medal Partner (No Beach Vacation Required)
1. Acknowledge the Real Work Happening—No Medals for ‘Surviving’
Let’s get this straight: Creating a human (or even trying to) is tough. Emotional turbulence is baked in. If you’ve opted for at-home insemination or fertility tools, like those from MakeAMom’s resourceful kit lineup, you know it takes two (or sometimes three or four!). Give credit where it’s due, and don’t keep score.
2. Stop Gaslighting—Start Listening
“Why are you so moody?” is not a rhetorical question. It’s usually a cry for help, or at the very least, a request for more Oreos. If your partner’s emotions are shifting, listen—really listen. Bonus points for snacks delivered bedside.
3. Share the Mental Load
You’d be amazed at how much mental real estate gets eaten up by tracking ovulation windows, reading up on sperm motility, and comparing kit instructions at 2am. (Pro tip: Some brands, like MakeAMom, offer super clear guides—use them!) Take on research, calendar reminders, and kit sterilization. You’ll both be less stressed for it.
4. Privacy Matters—For Everyone
This applies to more than discreet shipping boxes (which, yes, MakeAMom also nails). It’s about respecting boundaries: Don’t tell the group chat about your partner’s cervical mucus, and don’t share memes that trivialize their experience. Threaten to take a vacation ‘from her moods,’ and you’re just asking for trouble.
5. Celebrate the Small Wins, Together
Sometimes, it’s the negative pregnancy test that hurts. Sometimes, it’s the tenth try that works. Success rates with at-home insemination (like MakeAMom’s reported 67% average) are impressive, but the journey still takes patience and humor. Celebrate perseverance, not just the outcome.
Why This Matters: The Emotional Side of Fertility Innovation
The modern fertility landscape is full of game-changers: reusable kits instead of single-use waste, cost-effective solutions for wannabe parents, and a booming community of people building families in new ways. But emotional wellness—the real secret ingredient—hasn’t caught up to the technology yet.
It’s easy to get caught in the trap of ‘doing your part’ without realizing you might be unintentionally minimizing your partner’s marathon.
Here’s a reality check:
- Emotional support counts as much as logistics.
- If you need a break as a partner, ask for one, but don’t frame it as surviving your partner’s experience.
- If you need more tools, use what’s available. (Seriously, some home insemination brands have better FAQs than most hospitals.)
So, Should Partners Ever ‘Reward’ Themselves?
Of course you both deserve self-care. But it isn’t a competition for who had it worse, and it’s definitely not about ‘putting up with’ someone else’s struggles.
Mutual support, honest communication, and checking your ego at the door—these are the superpowers that get you through fertility journeys and the postpartum fog alike.
And if you’re still worried about finding the right tools, education, or community, don’t go it alone. Use resources like MakeAMom’s knowledge hub to learn, connect, and empower yourselves together.
Final Thought:
If you catch yourself reaching for those sunhats and flight deals in the name of ‘surviving’ pregnancy moods, maybe hit pause and ask: How can I show up better for my partner today?
Let’s give the gold medals (and the vacation days) to the teamwork—not the martyrdom. Comments are open: What’s your biggest “Did they really just say that?” moment on your fertility journey?